HAMER, SC - On Thursday, both President Biden and President Trump mistakenly held competing PR stunts at the famous roadside attraction, South of the Border. 

According to an anonymous source from the Trump campaign, the 45th president vehemently expressed his desire to visit South of the Border despite numerous staff members trying to warn him that he was confusing it with the United States’ southern border. And in President Biden’s case, a White House whistleblower revealed that Biden was intentionally sent to the popular travel destination so as not to accidentally go off script from the administration’s border policies at the actual border. 

Despite the seemingly obvious mix-up, both presidents failed to recognize that they were not indeed at the southern border.

“Disgusting. Absolutely disgusting,” President Trump said. “I nearly had diarrhea just from looking at the place… and then I had one of their chili dogs. And what’s in that big Mexican fella’s sombrero. Is it filled with drugs? I don’t know. I’ve heard some people say to me… experts say… that it’s a worldwide beacon to all the drug cartels. Whatever it is, we need a wall built and we need it now.”

President Biden, on the other hand, was unable to issue a statement as he was mesmerized by the thousands of wacky, cheap merchandise items. 

At press time, Biden and Trump were caught palling around by taking turns pretending to ride the red Dachshund statue.