NEW YORK CITY, NY - Just outside the Manhattan Criminal Court, Oscar award-winning actor and Biden campaign surrogate Robert De Niro held a press conference on Tuesday where he slammed President Trump and threatened to “paint Trump’s house” - a mafioso metaphor for murdering someone.

But while the Goodfellas and Irishman star drew heavy criticism from Trump supporters and right-leaning news outlets, the 45th President completely misunderstood De Niro’s euphemism and graciously accepted the offer. 

“Robert De Niro - or Robert De Zero as I call him - is just another wacky, LA lunatic who has nothing better to do than follow me around,” President Trump said. “But I suppose if he wants to paint my house, he’s more than welcome to. The hallway is looking a little rough after Biden’s FBI stormed my house and scuffed up the walls. Tell ya what Bobby, make sure to pick up Scotch Mist or Water Chestnut - NOT Eggshell.”

Despite the misunderstanding, Trump insisted he knew exactly what De Niro meant and claimed to coin the term “painting houses” with his grade school Italian immigrant girlfriend, Cosa Nostra. 

At press time, Biden accidentally said the quiet part out loud when he told reporters that he was confident De Niro was going to serve his campaign well by taking out President Trump “Jimmy Hoffa style”.